Jul 15
lemon
just when i was about to write how i happy i was to have a close-to-normal sleeping pattern (2 am-11am give or take an hour) i screw it up somehow. i thought i was tired at around 1:30 and then i just couldn’t get to sleep. then i watched spanglish and now it’s 6:30. it was bound to get screwed with this weekend anyway.
i’m going to work out tomorrow/today. i really need to. nothing complicated, just walking for at least half an hour with upper body weight training (i’m sure there’s a hyphen somewhere in there). i hope i’ll be able to make it without hacking my lungs out. i’m sure i will. my annoying head cold turned into an annoying chest cold. i’m so sick of not being able to sound normal or sing. the plus is that my abs are getting an incredible workout from all the coughing. i got a workout at dinner too thanks to jeff and his crazy antics. okay, they’re not really crazy or antic, i just love everything he does. i still can’t get crazy thoughts out of my head.
i don’t even know why anymore. nothing validates the way i think, yet i continue to do so. i really wish i didn’t. i almost feel like i have to lose it before i realize what i have. god help me if/when i move. maybe i’m just too tired right now. i know exactly what my problem is, but no one can fix it except me. it hurt me to read that. not that, something else that i wrote elsewhere. how did i end up like this? i’m sorry so many people put up with my problems. life would probably be a lot easier for them if they just stopped talking to me. or at least a portion of their lives would be easier.
i finally went to the library yesterday. borrowed around ten books. half of the time i write incomplete sentences. i like to think it’s part of my appeal. i’m wrong, but my thoughts are all i’ve got, despite their fraudulent constitution. i plan on reading some more after i’m finished this. if i ever finish it correctly. the spelling mistakes i’m making are horrendous. maybe i could get a degree in psychology with a minor in music. i’m sure that’s popular! yeah, i know i’m all over the map, but i have a lot of things on my mind with absolutely little time to think about it.
oh boy, now i’m tired. sleep it is. i won’t remember any of the book now anyway.
7 comments7 Comments so far
Don’t you think it’s funny that you get what you want (ie, a workout) when you least want or can have one? I mean… the whole abs thing with being sick. Life’s funny like that… like for example, falling down the stairs by finding money at the bottom. Ah, the irony.
Yes, I am a dork: which books did you get? Were they of “life-experience” related? Do you tend to read books from one author or a variety in a certain genre… in the first case, I noticed that there tends to be some repetition in some authors, which can be a little annoying. Well, have fun reading. YAY!
read “Night” by Elie wengel (spelling?). its fucking good.
Elie Wiesel
I just started reading a book that lives in our biography section at Chapters. Or at least it did until a friend of mine told me about it and I bought it. I don’t think I’ve ever read anything from that section, so it’s a whole different style for me.
It’s called ‘The Professor And The Madman’ by Simon Winchester. About a delusional former surgeon named W.C. Minor who submitted more than 10,000 definitions for the Oxford English Dictionary…..from the asylum he was confined to.
It’s really good, you’d like it. Especially if you happen to be Sean.
She’s Come Undone
by Wally Lamb
sooOOo damn good.
already read it, paula.
Hey, haven’t been here in a long time.
Anyways…if you’re unsure about what to do in life, just get a psychology degree. I learned this year that there are shitloads of jobs out there for psych majors. It’s really unbelievable. Or maybe it seems that way to me now because I really didn’t know anything about the careers of/opportunities for people who major in psych…whatever.
Oh and… “The Picture of Dorian Gray” by Oscar Wilde. I think you’d find it entertaining.