my eyes are so sore and i’m so tired, but i have so much studying to do. i’m glad this section of the course is going to be finished, but i’m not happy that we get the same teacher for the other sections. he’s far too subjective.

studying for accounting and intellectual property exams at the same time is going to be hell.

more things are changing. it’s harder to grasp a comfortable stance on this one because i have no way to ease into the situation. it’s just *boom* different. it’s making me sadder than i thought. that place is filled with memories. even before i knew of it, there were many parties and incidents that happened there. i can’t say i’m happy about the new situation, but at least it’s still in a livable/partying condition. if i know people, it will never truly get ‘fixed-up’ anyway. many unfulfilled promises are in that history.

the more i think about it, the sadder i get. i think i would’ve rather it been completely off limits and no one move into it. that’s much easier to swallow, for some reason.

i just started thinking about a bunch of things that completely sidetracked me from sentimentality. time for some spongebob.

i need more hats and more striped clothing. i was the queen of both at one time or another. i wore hats all the time from infancy ’til i was about six years old. i did the stripe thing from about eight or nine until fourteen? now, both are back with a vengeance and i only have a smattering amount of either. it’s a shame too, as i look so good in both.

yeah, i definitely need more stripes. i’m fairly certain i only have one seasonal striped shirt. oh well, shopping needs to be done.

i need money. i need it for a stupid reason that probably can’t even happen now, but i need it anyway. i have to be prepared for this. maybe i can convince people to go to another one too. that would just be awesome. it’s amazing how i fall every single time. no matter what, i always get the same feeling of not knowing enough. limited knowledge is frustrating and not good enough. bah.

update #1: hmm, detroit and then toronto in one weekend. sounds like a plan to me. stupid new york being on wednesday. maybe i’ll just have to skip things . . .

update #2: if anyone wants to be really nice and buy me white fluffy clouds for christmas, or just because i’m so great, i’d be very thankful.

update #3: i need an incubus buddy and i need an incubus day. when should i schedule such a day? i think next saturday will be good. an excellent way to celebrate numerous exams and tests being finished. now, to find the buddy. this could prove to be difficult. november 28th is too far away!

i’ve been feeling weird the last couple of days. it’s probably not going to end soon enough. maybe another week or so. maybe it’s done. i can’t be sure. i feel fine now. i hope i can stay that way.

i’m so insecure right now and i don’t know why. i feel like everything’s crumbling, but nothing’s changed since yesterday. i definitely need to be reassured. or maybe i need to change everything. is this delayed transitional fear? i’ve lost my footing. i really don’t know what i’m doing anymore. i hate questioning things. i need something to tell me i’m doing the right thing, that i’m right. is it terrible that i don’t know if i’m happy?