obliviously obvious

same deal as the first one. Read more

this is super long, so i’m providing it after a cut. i wrote it for a message board and i’m copying it from there because it took me three hours to write. i haven’t edited it for content or cohesion, so keep that in mind. i was also extremely lax with the grammar, especially by the end. here’s my picture. my explanation of why i look stupid is in there somewhere. here’s the other picture that’s so much better. thanks mel! Read more

if i think/see/hear/read anything about incubus, i start feeling a little bit depressed. i suppose it’s mostly because i don’t know when i’ll be able to see them again. i need a car. i also get anxious at the fact that it might not be so easy for me to get backstage again. they do meet tens to hundreds of people a day. then again, i think i’ve kept enough contact to keep myself present and distinct but not creepy or annoying, i hope. i assume that if i was bothering them, they’d just unfriend me and stop reading my messages and stop replying. what an insane night. it’s still so real that it’s almost a let-down. they’re exactly how they portray themselves. that’s an amazing trait after all these years. bah. too much.

this a completely random and pointless post.  oh well, i can say what i want.

i don’t even know where to begin. it was so good that it was almost anticlimactic in the way that they were exactly how they seem to be, so i got exactly what i was expecting. they lived up to my expectations so it only makes my fantasies and dreams a reality instead of dashing them to pieces. i only wish i had talked to b more and more directly like i did with everyone else. he was busy with old friends, so i didn’t want to bother him much. sitting next to him and listening to him right there was more than enough. oh yeah, and the stroking of my arm and the perfect hair. i shared a cigarette with ben. he got me a glass of wine too. then i had a beer with mike and he showed me their tour bus. they had plum pie on the counter.

i’ll write more later. i didn’t take any pictures because i didn’t want to be all ‘take a picture with me’. plus we were told not to take pictures and even though i know i could’ve, i still didn’t want to be all fan-ish.

i’m just glad i had really good conversations with interesting, intelligent people. it was almost like being with old friends. i felt that accepted and appreciated. i felt happier and more acceptance with a bunch of strangers (celebrities at that) than i do any one else, excluding family and one or two people. oh memories.

best night of my life . . . until the next time.

tomorrow after class i am going to get my hair cut and styled and then on a downtown shopping spree. i intend to pick up some hot pieces from american apparel. i should probably pre-shop online right now to verify the exact styles i want. then i have less than twenty-four hours until my moment of destiny.

my plan would’ve been flawless at the kool haus because there’s one entrance for everyone; no underground secret areas etc. i have no idea where the backstage entrance at the molson amphitheatre is. i suppose i’ll find out when i go for my meet & greet before the show. hmm, maybe this will work after all. i guess i just have to try for the after party passes while at the meet & greet. should i try myspace again as a precursor? or will that seem weird and annoying? he doesn’t have to read it i guess. might as well. but will it make him want to invite or avoid? such a fine line and one way could destroy all chances or start every thing! bah.

i think august 2nd is the date that will stick. the incubus concert was canceled in february due to illness. the new date was canceled due to mike getting surgery for his carpel tunnel. can’t have incubus without the guitarist. now, finally, the date is set for august 2nd. unfortunately, that means i only get to see them once this year and never in an intimate setting. the new venue is the molson amphitheatre, which i hate, but kool haus ticket holders get in an hour before the doors are open and get the pit and up to level 200.

what i hate most about the molson amphitheatre is that i have no idea where the buses are. does anyone know? can the public access it? i’m fairly certain i can’t just walk up to the area and wait for them to come out of the venue. i’m going to have to really work my ass off to get invited to the after show party. that’s if they’re even having after show parties for this leg of the tour. *sigh* regardless, august 2nd will be the best day of the year for me. i’ll have waited to see incubus for six months from the first date. it’ll be almost three years since i’ve seen them in concert. i’m going to try for a new york show too. i might as well. that’ll be my sixth time. the ultra lucky one. they haven’t got back to me about the vip thing yet. i should email them again.

i’m so happy that i have next week off. i’m supposed to be studying for my styles and genres exam right now, but i can’t focus. my final exam is on saturday. it’s contract law. oy, that’ll be a doozy to study for tomorrow. i should go to a study group, but i don’t feel like being social and studious at the same time right now. i’ll feel so good 3pm on saturday. then the week i’ll never remember shall begin.

i keep saying i’ll be drunk for this whole week, but i should start making plans now if i want to see it happen. i’ll talk to people tomorrow and see if they want to go to bodyenglish saturday night. oh, but i hate clubs. i really do. plus, saturday there looks like crap. 23+ men? no thanks. top 40 retro? i think only i would truly enjoy that. then there’s the problem. this is why i need to move.

i have places to call back for interviews. i’ll do that tomorrow right after my exam. i want a job, but i don’t know how well working downtown will work. i also hate going all the way downtown for an interview that lasts twenty minutes at the very most and then i don’t get the job. so frustrating! i still don’t know my schedule for third term. we’ll be starting before i find out.

i don’t want to study. i can’t focus on anything else right now. i feel like talking to someone. i hate what i’ve let my life become.