obliviously obvious

so that didn’t go very well. i’m aiming for two pounds a week and i really need to do it because i have a wedding to go to in september. it wasn’t an entire loss as i have lost some inches, just not enough to really make  a difference.  i have to work on getting my sleep schedule fixed because that messes with my plans on what and when i’m doing things. i wouldn’t mind how i looked/weighed if i could just fit into my regular pants. i refuse to buy anymore because i just like what i have too much. it’s pretty frustrating.

my last goal’s timeline was a tad unrealistic. my new goal: 115 by july 9th or fit into my pants/white shorts by then. weight’s not as important as size. off to shower.

i’m writing this here so i have to see it and be reminded a lot. my goal is to fit into my lace purple dress for my birthday. no exceptions, that’s just what i’m aiming for. if i don’t quite get there in time (it’s only three weeks. oy) it’ll be ok as long as i’m close. i guess a secondary goal will be my fat jeans being too big for me.

it’s amazing how a few little pieces of information can completely flip the way you see a person. oh well, i guess it’s natural and completely fine, just totally unexpected. i’m too drunk to write right now but things blew my mind tonight.

i miss people. i need people.

i’m fat. i need to work out again. i’ll get on that on thursday. too much to do in-between.

i’m happy, but it’s bitter sweet.

my goal for the summer: to look super hot in this

ugh, lot of hard work ahead. i think it’ll be worth it.

p.s. i mean the bikini, not sports illustrated magazine, just in case you were confused. hah.

i finally had an awesome dream! it was awesome. that one’s definitely a keeper. why am i writing this now? to procrastinate, of course. i still have to start some sort of dream journal. my problem is that i can’t write fast enough to get all the main points down. anyway, off to not be a fat slob.

woo! canada wins the gold! not a bad looking team either.